My sister is getting married and her imagination is filled with couples in furniture adverts who are always having pillow fights for some reason. She knows i'm against the idea of marriage & so she won't listen to me. Here's what i wanted to tell her.
After you get married you'll wish there were No friends, No football, just 24 hour devotion to you...but life ain't that generous!
Then one of you will inadvertenly start the chain which will eventually lead to the break-up process. You'd gradually stop thinking about everything that's going on inorder not to end up in a catatonic state listening to people pity you as they load you into an ambulance.
Having babies isn't as great as people say.
You'll fart, pee, puke, and poop in front of ten complete strangers who'll be staring intently at your vagina -- which, by the way, has an eighty percent chance of tearing!
You'll have to keep a list of all things your baby needs. Remember to keep him warm, support his head, check his diaper every fifteen minutes; no bouncing around, no loud noise, no TV, no poking the soft spot...& if you had to leave him with a nanny you'll have to remind her not to yell at, demean, insult, criticize, humiliate, or mock your baby because you and your husband agreed that you would wait until he's quite a bit older before you started systematically ruining his life.
There'll be times when (s)he gets sick and noone to drive him to hospital so you struggle to find a minicab driver too hashed up to care about the vomit judging from the smell of the cab, & nah, you child won't be vomiting candy I'm telling you.. and other times when you fight about whether ur kid should in 20 years be a doctor or an engineer make sure not to do it infront of the entire neighbourhood or else they'd be throwing shoes at you. If you had twins it'll be like telling your husband : "sorry hon, you're spending the next 20 years in slavery"
Bottom line...is the couples that are truly right for each other wade through the same crap as everybody else, but, the big difference is, they don't let it take 'em down.
It is a tough old world, baby. If u r not bolted together u're gonna shake, rattle, & roll before u turn 30!
Monday, September 04, 2006
Who wants to get married???
posted by Veeeva at 9/04/2006 08:24:00 PM
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14 Comments:
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At 1:05 AM,
Яαgιи Яαvєи -
At 7:24 PM,
admelmasry -
At 1:02 AM,
Polka Dotted -
At 5:20 AM,
loved ur post.. so funny and so true.. yeah babies are a hand-full but believe it or not.. when they r urs or even ur sister's they will be a heart-full (a friend made up that expression when i was telling him that my son is more than just a handful, and i found it so.. true)..
all this crap is coming from someone who used to wait at the clinic with her best friend saying "shit, i hate kids, why on earth am i becoming a mom!!!!" and she used to stare at me in disbelief and tell me "na3am yakhty, enty habla".. btw she's the one person i know who wants to get married that she's putting her whole life on hold for it although her "mr. right" still haven't shown up.. there r some crazy ppl out there but we love them for some reason -
marriage isnt bad unless you marry the wrong person, don't communicate, don't trust and lie to each other. yes, then you'll have lots of problems.
and babies.. there's a time and place for that. but it isn't something that couples should rush into. lots of ppl think children can save a marriage when, actually, it'll destroy it faster than anything if the marriage is already bad. -
Awww come on, babies are the cutest that's why we put up with all their crappy disgusting behaviour just to hear them tell ya Ma Ma, or give you that dumb funny smile! Those moments would be the world to me if ever I do have a little whiny cute and lovely creature who'd scream out of happiness whenever I walk by. Would serve my ego huh?
Oh and Congrats for ur sis ! Glad you didn't face her with your view, with all due respect, el bent kanet hatet3a22ad! -
i always was against marriage and i said that i'll never have children, because i found repulsing ruining my body, my mind, my life for some creature that only shits adn pukes, if anything i would adopt.
but then i met my mr. right whom i love so much and i wanted us to be eternal and i knew that we couldn't stay on this eart forever and i started to think and i realised that having a baby would make us last forever, the baby would be a proof of our love and i am willing to let go of a lot of things to have that.
but who know maybe i'll still change my mind :P
btw love all of your posts
Funny. I always wanted to write a post about babies, those freakishly tiny monsters.
I don't think I'm going to do that anymore. Dont get me wrong here.. babies are totally cute here as long as i don't have to take them back home with me.
And people who read this comment, please don't send me baby pictures.. i'm not the type of guy who'd say Awww.. koochie koo.. to me having someone show me a picture of a baby or send me a fwd with baby photos shot by someone supposedly famous is the beginning of a very awkward situation in which all i can do is send back an emoticon that says :D